Once upon a time, we had a joint family system where there were so many people to give us the much needed counselling in times of need, comfort when in distress, and also companionship where uncles, aunts and cousins, all lived under one roof. It was like a huge banyan tree with several branches. There was the head of the family in the form of the oldest family member or members, like grand parents. Of course there would be their own parents and several cousins in each family. There was no dearth of space since the house would be adequate to accommodate everyone. It was an unwritten code that the menfolk were the bread winners and it was left to the womenfolk to rear children and look after the well being of all the family members.
Gradually this system was changing in the natural evolution of things. There was also the migration of the family members to different places. Families became smaller by the day and the mindset of people also changed. There was more concern for their own families. Children and the parents still met at regular intervals and holidays were often spent together.
It was the same with all joint families. Nucleus families were a necessity more than a choice. Children lost their family contacts and love; they got more involved with their studies and then later, with their careers. Their visits were restricted to available time. One cannot say there was no affection, but in a more restricted way. Women had multiple roles now and no longer confined to their homes. They formed a responsible part of all the social changes, be it as a working women or as homemakers, whose roles were no less important.
All the same, changes did affect the deep affection we had even for a distant cousin. Grand parents, parents and their children formed an immediate family. Even that is disintegrating as an evolutionary, social change which is also becoming a necessity. Let us get along with this change and remember the good old days.
In retrospect, this post is very typical of an old timer. Generally I do not easily admit that, but once in a while it is good to feel old.
Nag's Musings 